Funeral Wakes in Singapore
As a funeral director in Singapore for over 20 years, I’ve seen many changes and adaptations in the way we conduct funeral wakes.
This guide aims to provide an in-depth understanding of funeral wakes in Singapore, from their origins to the modern practices we follow today.
It is also intended to guide those unfamiliar with Singaporean funeral wakes, providing insights into the customs, etiquettes, and processes involved.
It’s an updated guide for 2023, including the impact of technology and the pandemic on funeral practices.
Understanding Funeral Wakes in Singapore: A Short History
What is a Funeral Wake?
A funeral wake, also known as a “Chinese wake” or “wake ceremony”, is a traditional practice observed by many Singaporeans. It is a period of mourning that usually lasts for a few days before the funeral service and is a time for family and friends of the deceased to pay their respects and offer condolences.
Funeral wakes in Singapore are deeply rooted in tradition and vary significantly across different ethnicities. They are an essential part of our culture, reflecting our respect and love for the deceased.
Origin of funeral wakes
The tradition of funeral wakes can be traced back to various ancient cultures, where it was a time for family and friends to gather and pay their respects to the deceased. In Singapore, this practice has been shaped by different ethnic influences, including Chinese, Malay, Indian, and Eurasian.
In the 1970s, when most HDB buildings were still being designed and many of them did not have open spaces on the ground floor, funerals were often held in any nearby empty fields close to the family of the deceased.
They would set up big tents, some extending over 30 meters long, to accommodate the funeral. Makeshift tables and chairs were arranged for friends and relatives to pay their last respects to the deceased.
When Chinese people have funerals, they like to have them as close to home as possible because they believe that the spirit “recognizes the place”. It is also a very personal event that requires vigilance for several days, so having it near home makes it easier for the family to attend.
How they have evolved over time in Singapore
Over the years, funeral wakes in Singapore have evolved to accommodate modern lifestyles while preserving traditional customs. The introduction of professional funeral services, technology, and new regulations has streamlined the process, making it more accessible and respectful.
Different Ethnicities, Different Wake Practices
In Singapore, funeral wakes differ significantly across ethnicities.
For example, Taoist or Buddhist wakes are typically followed by the local ethnic Chinese, while Malay wakes follow Islamic customs.
The diversity in practices reflects Singapore’s rich cultural tapestry.
Taoist and Buddhist Funeral Customs in Singapore
Singapore is a multicultural society with many different religious beliefs. Taoist and Buddhist funerals are common in Singapore, and these often involve elaborate customs and rituals. Common practices include offerings to the deceased, chanting, and burning of incense and paper offerings.
What’s the difference between a wake and a viewing?
A wake is a social gathering held before the funeral, where friends and family come together to remember the deceased. A viewing, on the other hand, is a more formal event where the deceased’s body is displayed, and attendees can pay their respects. In Singapore, the terms are often used interchangeably, but the practices may vary.
The Funeral Wake Process
What Happens During a Funeral Wake?
Funeral wakes in Singapore usually take place at home, at HDB void decks, in a funeral parlour, or at a multi purpose space.
During this time, the body of the deceased is usually placed in a casket and surrounded by flowers, photos, and other mementos. Family and friends will gather to offer their respects to the deceased and offer condolences to the family.
How long does a funeral wake last?
A funeral wake in Singapore typically lasts for 1,3,5, or 7 days, in odd numbers, and depending on the family’s wishes and religious customs.
How much will a funeral wake cost?
The cost can vary widely, ranging from a few hundreds, to a few thousands, up to tens of thousands of Singapore dollars. It all depends on the venues, required services, and family preferences.
What is the role of a funeral director at a funeral wake?
As a funeral director, my role is to guide the family through the process, ensuring that all customs are followed, and the wake runs smoothly. This includes coordinating with various service providers, managing logistics, and being a pillar of support to the grieving family.Casket Services
Preparing For a Funeral Wake
Funeral Wake at HDB void Deck
HDB void decks are common venues for funeral wakes in Singapore, providing an accessible and affordable option.
In order to host a funeral wake at a HDB void deck, multipurpose hall, or pavilion, it is necessary to obtain a permit from your Town Council and communicate with them to secure the desired dates for the funeral.
To apply for the permit, it is required that you are:
– above the age of 21
– a relative of the deceased
– a HDB resident within the Town Council you are applying to.
The Town Council will provide guidance on the:
– available HDB communal spaces closest to your residential block
– fees for utilities such as water and electricity.
To obtain the permit and make payment, kindly visit your town council’s office. Remember to bring your NRIC, the digital death certificate, and either cash, NETS, or a credit card for payment purposes.
A funeral director (such as Jeffrey, funeral director of Embrace Funeral Services) will be able to provide guidance on this if you need help.
Technology’s Role in Modern Funeral Wakes
Technology has played a significant role in modernizing funeral wakes, from live-streaming services for those who can’t attend to digital guest books and memorial websites.
Updates in technology used in funeral wakes
As mentioned above, some LED wreaths have started being used at funeral wakes.
Some funeral wakes have also begun using live-streaming the funeral. Besides live-streaming, technology has enabled online obituaries, virtual condolence books, and even augmented reality memorials, making the process more interactive and personalized.
As for Embrace Funeral Services, we have also adapted with the times:
- Changed all lighting used to environmentally friendly LED bulbs
- Upgraded our music player and sound systems for better ambience and BGM
- We use a PA system to make announcements and provide guidance; for a more soothing and professional atmosphere and ambience.
- Instead of the traditional way of asking customers to hand-write funeral instructions, we provide a printed SOP and guide to our customers on the things to look out for and take note. (Download our simplified funeral guide here)
Impact of the pandemic on funeral wakes
When the COVID-19 pandemic was at its peak, it led to restrictions on the number of attendees and introduced safety measures, such as mask-wearing and social distancing.
At this moment in 2023, there are no restrictions.
However, attendees of funeral wakes, cremation and burial services are encouraged to continue to exercise personal responsibility and caution.
Read our guide to learn about any Covid restrictions on funeral wakes.
Post Funeral: Dealing with Ash Scattering, Burial or Cremation after the funeral wake
After the funeral wake, the deceased may be buried, cremated and interred at a columbarium, or have their ashes scattered. This decision is often made by the family, but there may be legal requirements and permits needed for certain burial and cremation methods.
Funeral directors can provide guidance on these matters.
Essential Etiquettes at a Singaporean Wake
Proper Ways to Show Condolences
It is appropriate to approach the casket quietly and offer prayers or thoughts for the deceased. Family members of the deceased may also have a guest book or condolence cards available for visitors to sign and leave messages of support.
Dress Code for Funeral Wakes
What to wear:
When attending a funeral wake, you should dress modestly and appropriately.
Dress code varies by ethnicity but generally leans towards modest and somber clothing. For Chinese wakes, black or white attire is common, while Malays may prefer white or muted colors. Black is the traditional color of mourning, but dark colors such as navy and grey are also acceptable.
What Not to Wear During a Funeral Wake
Avoid wearing bright or flashy colors, as these can be seen as disrespectful. Additionally, clothing should not be revealing or inappropriate for the solemn occasion.
Respectful behavior at the wake
Respectful behavior includes speaking softly, turning off mobile phones, and avoiding inappropriate topics. It’s about creating a serene environment to honor the deceased.
It is also good to follow the instructions of the family and funeral director, and to be mindful of the wishes of the deceased and their relatives.
What to Do and Say to the Deceased Family?
Offering condolences and support to the family of the deceased is an important part of attending a funeral wake. Simple gestures such as offering a hug, expressing sympathy, or sharing a happy memory of the deceased can be a great comfort to those who are grieving.
Sending flowers, attending the wake, offering assistance, or simply being there for the grieving family are all appropriate ways to show sympathy.
What to say
Expressing condolences is essential, but it’s best to keep it simple and sincere. Phrases like “I’m sorry for your loss” or “Take care of yourself” are appropriate.
Proper Etiquettes for Attending a Funeral Wake
When attending a funeral wake, it is important to be respectful and attentive to the customs and beliefs being observed. This means avoiding any behavior that might be seen as inappropriate or disrespectful, such as excessive talking or laughter.
Offering Joss Sticks and Wreaths
In Chinese wakes, offering joss sticks is a common practice. Joss sticks are long, thin sticks of incense that are lit and placed in a burner.
Wreaths are also another way to express sympathy and can be sent by those who cannot attend the wake.
Wreaths are circular flower arrangements that are placed near the casket or around the premises of the wake area.
What to Say during Joss Stick Offering?
When offering joss sticks, it’s customary to bow and silently express your wishes or prayers for the deceased.
Any new laws or regulations about wakes in Singapore
LED wreaths and inflatables
New guidelines have been introduced in Singapore for the use of LED wreaths and inflatables at funeral wakes.
These regulations were jointly developed by the National Environment Agency (NEA) and Association of Funeral Directors Singapore (AFD) to address public and safety concerns.
Some examples of new laws and regulations include:
- A limit is set on the number of LED wreaths that can be used. Only up to 10 LED wreaths, including one inflatable, are allowed at each funeral wake.
- LED wreaths must be turned off between 10pm and 7am to prevent light and noise pollution.
- The licensed electrical worker overseeing the installation must apply for the SI permit for generator usage.
Find out about about the new laws and regulations in this news article: https://www.channelnewsasia.com/singapore/new-guidelines-limit-led-wreaths-funeral-wakes-safety-concerns-2733931
A Respectful Goodbye
Funeral wakes in Singapore are a blend of tradition and modernity, reflecting our multicultural society. Understanding the customs, etiquettes, and processes involved helps us pay a respectful and heartfelt goodbye to our loved ones.
If you need to plan a funeral wake in Singapore, do not hesitate to reach out to us at Embrace Funeral Services. With over 2 decades of experience, we can plan a funeral with the utmost respect and compassion.
