One of the most challenging experiences in life is getting through the loss of a loved one. The truth of the matter is that losing someone to death is not simply one devastating blow. It is a immensely ground-breaking loss that can trigger a sequence of other smaller and secondary losses in the aftermath. Most people, if not everyone, experiences grief as a natural response to losing a loved one. The loss is more severe and traumatic if the person is someone you are close or someone who is exceptionally important to you. What if that person was your significant other? What happens when you suddenly find your girlfriend or boyfriend no longer there for you?
Experiencing the loss of your girlfriend or boyfriend can be extremely confusing and painful. It is a pain worse than going through a divorce or a breakup. So many things can trigger the memories of your loved one, such as going to a location where you once had a date at. When the person who knew you very well and embraced every flaw and weakness about you is no longer present, the world can feel bleak and dark. Love that was once unconditional might seem like an impossible thing, reduced to nothing but fleeting moments and memories. You might start to miss them in millions of ways that are all subtle and implicit. These are part of the chain reaction of secondary losses. First, you find yourself waking up to an empty bed. You would miss their warmth, and their presence that would make you breakfast each morning. Even their voice. Then, you would miss that level of presence that is physical and is intimate. Every human craves comfort in the physical sense from someone that they are attracted to and love. You might long for that intimacy but you might find yourself unable to open up to other people. All these secondary losses might seem overwhelming, like a series of dominoes crashing down over your life.
Do not lose hope. It is perfectly normal to feel what you are feeling. Your experience of grieving over the loss of your partner is valid and natural. It is crucial for you to realise that secondary losses can be overcome. Everyone has their unique way of processing secondary loss. From a sense of identity to goals and dreams that you might have shared with your significant other, there are many things you could lose. What is important is that you find yourself a support system. Instead of isolating yourself, reach out and open up. Do not close your heart away from the world.
Having multiple generations of experience at managing funeral services in Singapore, the professionals at Embrace Funeral Services strive to support families during those difficult times. By letting the professional undertakers handle the logistics and preparations, you can mourn and bereave over the loss of your loved one in a way that is healthy and appropriate. With bereavement support provided, you will not feel alone.